Just because I am not a known quantity – I am not nobody.
There are a lot of well-known authors out there. Many write in the same genres that I do.
George RR Martin. Neil Gaiman. Andy Weir. Arthur C. Clark. Isaac Asimov. I’m sure you’ve heard of one if not all of them.
For every well-known author, there are dozens of lesser-known and unknown authors. Some have a specific appeal, others just haven’t gotten the Netflix, Prime, or movie deal to gain further recognition.
And then there are those just trying to get enough recognition to make a living off our work. We seek readers like ourselves, willing to take a chance on an unknown quantity and read our stories.
Novels are very much like children in that we give them a ton of love and affection, nurture and grow them – then send them out into the big, bad world all on their own.
Because of how we love them – we take criticism of them, lack of interest in them, and the like – personally. As such, when you are not a known quantity – and the sales of your artworks are not as you desire them to be – you can feel like you are nobody.
Maybe I am not yet a popular author with fans eagerly awaiting my next book. But I am not nobody.
You are and are not your art
A piece of me is in everything I write. Maybe there is not a character in my books that is a direct reflection of me – but I’m there.
My ideals, some of my convictions, my dreams, and my imagination are utterly tied to my work. Every single artist in every medium that I know feels the same. Making art is as necessary as breathing air. It’s essential to who I am. Most other artists I know feel that way, too.
Because we are invariably tied directly into our artwork, it’s easy when the art is not gaining the desired recognition to feel that we are not recognized.
As a writer, I’m not a known quantity. As a person, that can make me feel like I’m nobody.
Yet because I am not getting the reviews or seeing the sales of my books where I would prefer they be – it feels like that reflects on me. It feels like my books are nothing. This can make me feel like I am nothing. If I am nothing, then I am nobody, right?
Wrong. Because I am not nothing and I am not nobody. I am an artist – a writer who is producing books and continuing to grow my catalog. Because I believe in myself and what I am doing – I continue to work to improve my craft and garner the recognition to reach that next level.
Still, that doesn’t mean that I don’t feel blah. There are days the brain weasels chitter loudly and make me feel worthless. All beliefs that I am nobody are naught but a reaction to feeling down.
Disconnecting from taking your art too personally is not easy. But it can help to balance the negative feelings.
Not everyone can create what you do
I often think about what my work is. Words belong to everyone and can be presented, shaped, manipulated, and shared in a myriad of ways. Because they are everywhere, I forget that not everyone can do with them what I can.
Just because I can write a 50,000-word novel in a month doesn’t mean everyone else can. I have friends who turn out incredible works of calligraphy and illumination – and I cannot do that. Other friends of mine produce art in ceramic, glass, and metal – I can’t do that either.
Everyone uses words – but not everyone can create fiction or share their inner thoughts with words as I can. This means that this belief in the lesser value of my work is false.
I’m pretty sure that every accomplished novelist, painter, sculptor, actor, singer, chef, or artist of any other medium began as an unknown. They weren’t just hatched from some Well-Known-Artist Egg or other instant thing. They worked on their craft and did what they could to gain their audiences.
While I seek to build and grow my audience – I am not nobody. Unknown is not the same and non-existent. It can feel that way sometimes – but it’s not the truth.
I am not nobody
I’m asserting this truth because it’s important. This isn’t some matter of arrogance or self-aggrandizement. It’s the acknowledgment of an important truth.
Maybe my work is not well-known. And maybe I am still a largely unknown quantity. But I am not nobody because of these things.
I am still a creative artist, sharing my work with the world. There are several reasons why I do this and intend to continue to do this:
- I love creating my art
- I believe in myself and my work
- The stories I desire to tell are worth telling
- This is the path for me
- I deserve to walk that path
All the authors I named at the beginning of this started as unknown quantities. To be fair, they took a different approach from mine. That does not, however, make my approach, my work, nor me myself any less valid.
Sure, there are days I wonder if I’m wasting my time and energy. However, I believe in who I am and what I am doing. And I know that I am worthy and deserving of moving from an unknown to a known quantity.
But I am not nobody. And you are not nobody. The judgment passed on us by others doesn’t make or break us. You have value and worth – because you are here.
Whatever it is you do – artist or not – you are not nobody. There are almost 8 billion people on this planet – and every one of us is somebody. That’s the truth – whether anyone else recognizes it or not.
Unknown quantity – but I am not nobody
It will take time and various efforts to gain the recognition I seek to sell books at a greater, more career-sustaining level.
Hence, I acknowledge that – for the most part – I am an unknown quantity. But that doesn’t mean I am nobody. I am not nobody – I am an artist, creator, and still growing and evolving. Because I believe in my art – I know that I won’t be an unknown quantity forever.
The struggle is real. It’s hard not to feel like nobody while you develop your fanbase and expand your catalog of work. This applies to every form of art. When we recognize and acknowledge that unknown quantity is not the same as being nobody – we empower ourselves to grow and evolve on many levels.
Finally – if today is a bad day, and you feel like a nobody because you’re an unknown quantity – take heart. You are not alone. Keep at it, believe in your art and yourself – and remember you are somebody. Somebody awesome.
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