Sometimes a question answered still requires unnecessarily explaining yourself.
Every adult I know gets asked the following question:
What do you do for a living?
My answer to the question is,
I am a writer.
That’s my career choice. I write full-time.
No, that doesn’t mean I am writing from 9 am-5 pm, Monday through Friday. I am a writer means I’m also editing, plotting, and because I’m self-published marketing and exploring ways to increase sales.
Oh, and since I’ve decided to make my Forgotten Fodder series available as an audiobook, I’m also recording and editing that, too.
I don’t need to explain all the above to anyone else. However, many people react to my career statement with a visible pause.
I know what they are thinking if they don’t outright ask. Does that make you any money? Is that really a career option? I’ve never heard of you – are you for real? What does your family think of that choice? Are you insane? And similar.
I know full-well that I am a writer is not the only career statement that garners this response, or one akin to it. This applies to I am an artist, I’m a singer, I am an actor, I’m a sculptor, and virtually every other creative, artistic career pursuit.
Explaining yourself to a stranger or casual acquaintance is unnecessary. But when it comes to friends and family – they often demand more.
But the truth is – explaining yourself isn’t necessary.
The questions may be projections
There is a societally accepted way to live. It involves the standard get up in the morning, go to work at some banal job from 9-5 or so, go home, rinse and repeat. Buy things to show off your accomplishments and to help you enjoy the free time you have on weekends and during sparse vacations.
To be fair, there are people perfectly content living like that. And if there aren’t – how come so many people do it?
For me – and other creatives – this is not the way. Sorry, the standard 9-5 job in a cubicle farm tends to feel no different from some form of prison to me.
The thing is – most people don’t desire that sort of life. They just accept it as The Way Things Are. And why wouldn’t they? All the messages from news media, politicians, religious leaders, and numerous other sources claim it to be true.
Again, for some people, I’m sure this is great. But there is never truly a One Size Fits All solution to anything.
Thus – when the people who care about you bombard you with questions demanding that you explain yourself – it’s often a projection.
Look at those people. Did they choose something conventional? Odds are, they did. And that is why they want you explaining yourself. Because you chose to buck the norm.
Most artists in professional pursuit of their craft spend time struggling. Every well-known writer, painter, sculptor, and creatives of every stripe began as an unknown. It takes diligence, focus, and dedication to succeed.
Success doesn’t necessarily mean becoming a household name. It might just be creating a sustainable income stream via your creative work. Which, since you remain less known, continues to beg the question of explaining yourself.
Why explaining yourself feels necessary
Choosing to be a writer full-time has been challenging.
Reaching the point where I have a sustainable income via my writing is complicated. Getting all the pieces into place to make this function as desired is an ongoing work in process. But I am making progress.
All the other writers, artists, and creatives I know have faced similar challenges. This path is not easy. Worthwhile, to be sure. Easy? No.
Here is one of the greatest ironies of our society. Accountability tends to be neglected, ignored, and outright denied. For a perfect example of this – see Donald Trump. Here is a man who takes responsibility for nothing at all – save his ultimately imagined greatness.
The one place where trickle-down theory works is here. Politicians overall are particularly adept at avoiding, denying, and casting off accountability.
The societal irony to this comes in the demand that you be accountable to your part in society. More often than not – that comes down to your job.
This is why explaining yourself feels necessary. Because all the messages that you have little to no worth or value in our society – unless you have a job (and the “right” job) – dominate. Explaining yourself even gets dictated by the government when it comes to unemployment, taxes, and the like.
When your career choice is not the norm – artist, writer, actor, and so on – people are skeptical. They then judge that you are probably not living up to the unsigned social contract you must be accountable for.
Of course, this isn’t true of everyone, it’s a generalization. If you’ve not experienced it – you have been fortunate.
Explaining yourself to yourself
I need to address this, but it’s going to be uncomfortable for some people.
For everyone pursuing their creative work as a career – there are also people not giving it their all. Some people use creative arts as an excuse to avoid “adulting.”
When I look at the numbers – output versus input – I sometimes question if I’m fooling myself. When I’m explaining myself, am I just making excuses for feeling uncomfortable in a conventional work environment? Am I lazy? Have years of uncertainty caused me to use I am a writer as some kind of excuse?
Looking back – this is what I’ve always returned to. And since starting to write on a more set schedule, my productivity is up considerably. If I point you to my Amazon author page you can see just how many books I’ve put out.
Also, between my blogs, there are more than 10 years of constant articles on a wide range of topics. Hence, I am a writer is not an excuse – I’m just trying to set up the dominos in new ways to make it more financially stable.
Keep in mind, I am not saying someone who’s working on but hasn’t finished or published work isn’t an author. What I am saying, though, is that you need to know yourself. Are you genuinely putting in the work, the time, and the effort to do creative work? Or, on closer examination, are you just using it as an excuse – and explaining yourself to others is also explaining yourself to yourself?
Be honest with your answer.
Be true to yourself
The most important thing is to be true to yourself. You are worthy and deserving of your creative pursuits. Writer, painter, singer, actor, sculptor, or what have you – make the most of this that you can.
The world needs creatives. Without us, it’s a much less colorful and interesting place. Not to knock mother nature – but sometimes giving voice to her beauty requires creatives for a more complete expression and appreciation.
Explaining yourself to others can be tiring. But it’s not necessary unless you believe it to be. Thus, there’s nothing wrong with the exchange being this simple:
Q: What do you do for a living?
A: I am a creative (writer, painter, singer, etc.)
Further explaining yourself isn’t required.
I am a writer, for me, isn’t just a statement of my career choice. This is me being the best me that I can be. I love my work – and that, in turn, helps me to express how much more I love my life. Ultimately – that’s thoroughly worthwhile to me.
One chance in this body, during this life experience. Does it/should it really require me to further explaining myself?
Please take a moment to check out the collection of my published works, which can be found here.
Feel free to explore the rest of the website. Also, visit Awareness for Everyone to check out my weekly podcasts.
Enjoying the website and my endeavors? I’d be grateful if you would consider becoming a patron through my Patreon.
You can subscribe to my newsletter. Fill in the info and click the submit button to the right and receive your free eBook.
Follow me here!
You must be logged in to post a comment.